• MeidasTouch

Op-Ed: American Politics Is Getting Really Easy To Understand

By Sam Youngman & Adam Parkhomenko


Back before math went and got all fancy, teachers used to torture students with what they called “word problems.”


They sounded something like this:


A train leaves the station at noon carrying a bunch of people who want to get you healthcare and money to deal with the pandemic and equality for people who get left behind or treated like shit.


At the same time, a second train leaves a station a billion miles away in a different reality. This train is carrying domestic terrorists, scumbags who harass school shooting surivivors, Ted Cruz and a big fuck you to anyone who wants a functioning democracy or government help during a crisis.


The old word problems were much harder to figure out. This one should be a no-brainer.


Because really, has it ever been easier to tell the two major political parties in this country apart?


In the three weeks that Joe Biden has been president and Democrats have controlled the House and the Senate (that three weeks doesn’t apply here because Mitch McConnell is an asshole who ate up our time on the clock), take a look at what the two parties have done:


Democrats have passed a budget resolution that allows them to pass a $1.9 trillion relief plan that will help a country that has been wrecked by the pandemic while helping to fund the pathway out of the pandemic by funding a massive vaccine program.


Democrats have smashed barriers for people who were previously kept from serving in some of the highest jobs in our country.


Democrats have moved to increase the minimum wage and give Americans a raise.


Democrats have moved to overhaul the immigration system based on laws and compassion and not the hateful bigotry of some racist assholes.


And Democrats have moved to hold Donald Trump accountable for sending a mob of terrorists to attack our Capitol and our democracy on Jan. 6.


That isn’t a comprehensive list. But suffice it to say that in the middle of multiple crises threatening to destroy America, Democrats have been working their asses off to stop that from happening.


Now let’s take a look at what Republicans have been doing. Surely it will be a long list too.


Republicans have fought us every step of the way on COVID relief.


Republicans lied and made excuses for Trump’s incitement of a terrorist attack on our Capitol that has now claimed the lives of three police officers.


Republicans rallied to the defense of a nutjob who harasses school shooting survivors, believes Jewish space lasers start California wildfires, questions whether a plane really hit the Pentagon on 9/11 and shared about a dozen other horrifying, racist conspiracy theories.


Republicans put said nutjob on the House Education and Labor Committee (until Democrats had to do the dirty work of removing the nutjob from those committees).


Republicans fully aligned themselves with Q-anon lunacy and other white supremacists who want to overthrow the American government.


So as you can see, both parties have been pretty busy.


One is working very hard for the American people. The other is working very hard to be crazier than a shithouse rat.


Like we said, this should be a no-brainer.


Unfortunately, four years of Trump have taught us that the number of no-brain voters is dangerously high.


But for now and hopefully in the coming months, the difference between the two parties and what they will do, are doing and could do for America will stay this crystal clear.


Because one train is bringing help. The other one has gone off the rails.


And you don’t have to be good at math to know which one is good for the country.

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