top of page
  • Writer's pictureMeidasTouch

Op-Ed: By Trying To Steal An Election, Trump Has Awakened The American Spirit

By Sam Youngman & Adam Parkhomenko

Trade deficits, the relationship between testing and COVID-19 cases, stealth aircraft technology, NATO funding levels, the female orgasm probably.

This is just a short list of the many, many things President Donald Trump doesn’t understand. But it’s his misunderstanding of the hearts of Americans that is going to cost him the most.

After limping to a popular vote loss and an Electoral College victory four years ago, Trump believed he had figured out the secret recipe to winning American elections. Just take some populist bullshit, throw in several cups of overt racism, mix in some attacks on anyone who questions you and top it off with a few sprinkles of claiming everything is rigged. 

And for about 46 percent of the country, it worked. So he assumed it would work again. And, for all we know, it might.

But if it doesn’t, it’s for one simple reason: Donald Trump doesn’t understand Americans, and he never really has.

After America put a dim-witted game show host in the Oval Office four years ago, the phrase you heard most from friends, relatives and even top political reporters was that “nothing matters.” Trump governed like that was true. He put our money in his pocket, he sold us out to our enemies, he put kids in cages, he elevated the worst among us and then he left us to die and lied about it as our world was turned upside-down. 

But some things do still matter to Americans. We don’t like politicians stealing from us. We don’t like racist trash getting a platform. We don’t like being sold out. We sure as hell don’t like being lied to, and we are fucking furious that he left us to die. 

But now after four years of this crap, Trump is trying for one last big heist, one last fuck you to the constitution and the American people — he’s trying to steal an election by throwing out our votes or keeping us from the polls altogether.

It will prove to be a politically fatal mistake.

In Thursday’s Fort Worth (Texas) Star-Telegram, there is a story about Meredith Reilly. Reilly is a junior at American University in Washington, D.C. A Texas native, Reilly wanted to cast her ballot by mail. When it didn’t show up, she got in the car and drove almost 1,400 miles to make sure her vote counted. Meredith Reilly is an American patriot. 

Wednesday’s Washington Post featured a story that contained more anecdotes about people booking flights home to vote in person and make sure their voice is heard. And for the past few weeks, we’ve seen long lines and early turnout numbers shattered as voter after voter explained to reporters that they stayed in those long lines the whole time because they weren’t going to let anyone shut them up. 

If Trump understood Americans — like really understood Americans — he would know that one of the best ways to motivate us is to underestimate us. Lie to us, and we’ll call your ass out. Tax us too much, and we’ll throw your tea in the harbor. Try to stop us from voting, and we will be at the polls and in the streets in numbers you’ve never seen.

Trump thinks he understands American anger. It’s why he goes to Michigan and winks and nods at those who would kidnap and harm an elected official. It’s why he smiles at the Proud Boys. And it’s why he came down an escalator ranting about rapists and murderers. 

But there’s a big damn difference between ignorant hatred and righteous anger. One motivates you to do the kind of stupid, evil shit that wins you a visit from the FBI and a nice vacation in the federal pen. The other motivates you to make an extra battleground state call or text when you’re tired, to give a few more bucks, to drive across the country to make sure your vote is counted. 

Trump has the hatred locked up. But the righteous anger is on our side. 

Now look, the nerve-wracking brain-melting truth is that we have no idea if it will be enough. But we know we’ve sure as hell had enough, and an angry American, is a determined American.

You can’t blame Trump for thinking this would work. Just look at the way his party fell to its knees to kiss his ass like his North Korean pal. Trump saw Lindsey Graham licking his boots and a sea of racist assholes wearing MAGA hats and assumed he had bent this country to his will.

But boot-licking and hatred for your fellow countrymen and women is not the American way. And deep down in their cold, shriveled hearts, the rest of the Republican Party knows it.

That’s why Moscow Mitch McConnell spent last weekend rigging the Supreme Court instead of doing his actual job and helping a nation in pain from a deadly and badly mismanaged pandemic. It’s why every strategy Trumpland has for winning involves soulless lawyers and crooked judges and not voters. It’s why senators like Mike Lee are openly talking about America not being a democracy.

If our government is decided by the people, then Moscow Mitch and Trump and the rest of their buddies are toast. That’s why they’re trying to stop us. And in doing so, they have pissed off a country that comes ready to fight when it is pissed off. 

We can still have this election stolen from us. They’re still trying to silence us. And maybe they’re right that there’s a hidden sea of dumbfuck racist COVID-loving dipshits who are desperate for four more years of this nightmare. 

But with just a few days left until Election Day, we feel pretty good about where we are. Because Americans are mad as hell and ready to do something about it.


To read our daily newsletter filled with politics stuff, cuss words aimed at the Trump family and jokes about Rudy Giuliani having sex with his own cousin, sign up at

bottom of page